Schmoo, the Low Ding Zone mascot, is a polyester Santa Cruz banana slug. Xe has xiblings, Schmee (who lives in Virginia) and Schmaa (who lives in England and is planning to emigrate to America soon). They’ve become the symbols of a thus-far mythical handbell event, SCHMEE (Sadomasochistic Chime/Handbell Maniacal Ensemble Extravaganza).

Being a SCHMEE-qualified handbell ensemble requires a love of extraordinarily challenging music, a willingness to attempt that which heretofore has been considered impossible, and a vanishingly miniscule sanity quotient (corollary: a near-infinite penchant for [legal] handbell activities of the crazier ilk). Low Ding Zone continually aspires to exemplify this ideal.

Schmaa, Schmee and Schmoo encourage the distribution of S&Ms (a 50-50 mixture of M&Ms and Skittles) at all handbell events, and have been known to remind participants that they should really enjoy the entire experience rather than picking and choosing S’s only or M’s only.

They also recommend the ingestion of liberal quantities of Candy Corn Brandy, which they manufacture at their respective homes. This is a rather iridescent, aubergine-colored beverage which, in even moderate quantities, is sufficient to deck most large zoo animals. However, schlugs are immune to the effects thereof, and continue singing their “CCB songs” loudly and lustily. But that’s another story.